This is what I don't want to have to say..

No No No. This is not what I meant. It was a weak moment, and I was feeling guilty. It was the red wine, the music, the photobooth strip of us that I happened upon while cleaning my room. I meant only what I said: That I am sorry. That I never wanted to hurt you. That I know how it sucks, that I'm not some asshole blowing you off, I've been hurt like everyone else and it kills me to be the one to do that to you. I thought enough time had passed for me to say this. I only called because I knew I wouldn't have to talk to you, that I could just leave a message. I really did/do think you are wonderful. But you never did really listen to me, because I never told you I shared your feelings, I was always honest and when you kept running off with it and ignoring my protests I had to do what I thought was right. Because you weren't going to protect yourself. Why do you do this? You are a great artist, you have alot going for you, where is your dignity? I gave it a shot, we tried, but it just wasn't right for me. I wasn't ready for it, I had just gotten out of a relationship. But even now that all that is long gone and healed over I still do not want to be with you romantically. I am seeing someone else. I don't know why it can't be you but it just can't. I would have liked to have you in my life, I do miss you very much but I don't think you are able to be my friend. Good god, do not start stalking me, do not make me have some confrontation with you, quit calling me all the time, please pick up your pieces and move on. I am in the middle of trying to move, I am working all the time, I have a million stresses pouring over my head please I beg you let me alone I do not need this I do not want this I do not have this coming. I don't want to be this asshole, I do not want to threaten you and push back but I will if I have to and if you continue this shit you will see how very unkind I can be.